One Last Hurrah
by OliviaJane
Summary: While Edward is away hunting, Emmett is left in charge of keeping an eye on Bella. Come along as they play one of the most ridiculous games to ever be created. Pure Emmett and Bella silliness.


**A/N: Pure Emmett and Bella silliness. While Edward is away Emmett is left in charge of keeping an eye on Bella. Come along as they play one of the stupidest games to ever be created. READ and REVIEW...Thank ****you.**

******Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns any Twilight characters that may appear in this story. The remainder is my original work. Copyright 2008 by the author writing under the pen name, OliviaJane. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without my express written authorization.**  
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**One Last Hurrah**

I woke to something tickling my ear. "Quit Edward," I said, swatting in the direction where I usually found him lounging every morning.

The tickling continued, only aggravating mefurther. I was not the kind of person you messed with in the morning. "NOT NOW! I'm sleeping," I all but screamed, my agitation growing due to being robbed of my precious sleep. I nestled my head farther into my pillow hoping he would take the hint.

Then I heard a low chuckling. It was one I recognized, but not that of my angel. My eyes shot open and I abruptly rolled over to face the window. There perched leisurely on the sill was Edward's lovable, but quite annoying older brother Emmett, twirling a feather between his fingers. I groaned, throwing the comforter over my head.

"Well, well Bella. Now exactly what is it that you don't want Edward doing to you _right _now?" He chuckled like a maniac. Of course, what else would I expect from him? His mind was always in the gutter.

"Emmett," I scolded. "I'm not even going to justify that with an answer. Why on earth are you here?" I grumbled through the layers of blankets. I could almost guess word for word what he was going to say. Edward was out hunting with the rest of his family and I was certain it was Emmett's turn to baby-sit, danger magnet Bella. This still irked me to no end. I threw back the covers and pouted as I glared back at Emmett.

"Ah, come on Sunshine, it's such a waste of time and energy to be so mopey. So I say, turn that frown upside down, and let's go have some of our own little escapades," he cheered, giving me his famous infectious grin.

I did my best to hold back a smile,not wanting him to know just yet that my resolve was waning.

"Think of it as one last hurrah before your change, you won't need me using all this brawn to protect you after that," he said puffing his chest out and he wavedhis hand, as he gestured towards his well built rock hard body.

I giggled, the last of my resolve gone. "Emmett, your such a pretentious ass. Now go down stairs and wait for me. Oh, and can you keep yourself out of trouble, please?"

"Yes, ma'am," he saluted me as he sauntered out of my room, closing the door behind him.

I looked up towards the ceiling, saying a silent prayer that he would keephis hands to himself. The last time I'd left him unattended in the living room, he'd destroyed Charlie's TV pretending he was some major league baseball player. That had been a fiasco I never wanted to see a repeat of.

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I was lounging on the, oh so comfy, couch in the Cullen's spacious living room, picking at the turkey sandwich Emmett had insisted on preparing for me. I hadn't been back very long from my, "Emmett's morning of funness," as he'd been calling it for the last four hours.

After leaving my house, he ran us through the forest at lightening speed; when I finally dared to open my eyes we were sitting perched atop a massive oak tree. Here we spent the next two hours leisurely playing what seemed like an endless game of I-Spy. When it finally came to an end, he zipped us once again through the trees to the hot springs. Here we splashed and played, like a brother and sister would do, having a merry-o time.

As I nibbled on my yummy sandwich, Emmett sat on the opposite end of the couch watching me intently. I found this happening more often than not when I ate anything in the presence of members of the Cullen family. I imagined it was their curious disgust that I could take such horrible tasting things into my mouth, that enthralled them so. I chuckled inwardly.

When I was finished eating, I sat with anticipation for him to excitedly announce what caper we'd be embarking on next. A quick glace at his face revealed it would be sooner than later; and if I were a betting girl, it would be real soon.

"Hey, Bella. I know I've just about plum wore you out with all our adventures this morning, so I was thinking we could play a game that would allow you to stay put right here on the couch," he spoke with assurance.

I eyed him questioningly. With my voice full of apprehension I asked, "And what might that game be?"

He chuckled as his eyes lit up. "Don't go having yourself an aneurysm Bella, it's nothing that outlandish. It's just a little game I like to call, 'I cut you down so low…' When I was growing up in the hills of Tennessee, my brothers and I would play it when we got bored. We mostly played it during the winter months when our maw would keep us locked up tight inside the house during the harsh snow storms.

"I cut you down so low?" I asked speculatively, still with a bit of apprehension.

"Yeah, it's a cut down game. The challenge is to see who can come up the best cut down. Here, let me throw one at you. You're a smart witted girl, I'm sure you'll catch on quickly," he laid his finger on his chin as if he were thinking intently. "Hmm, let's see…oh, I got one," he said excitedly. "I cut you down so low, you'll be able to jump through a flaming fruit loop."

I watched him with amusement. What a simpleton's game I thought, but what the heck, I needed something to distract me until my Edward returned to me. Plus, this could actually be quite amusing to play with someone as crazy as Emmett.

He eagerly nodded for me to take my turn. I smirked and laid one on him, "Emmett, I cut you down so low, you'll have to carry a sign that says, "Please don't spit, I can't swim."

He nearly fell offthe couch, he was laughing so hard. Apparently I'd gotten him good. I was shockingly pleasedwith how quickly I had come up with that. Yes, this was going to be fun.

Taking a few unnecessary breaths to compose himself he added, "I cut you down so low, a hamster would look like a ferocious grizzly bear to you."

I smacked my feet on his leg repeatedly as I was overcome with giggling fits. "I cut you down so low, you'll be able to join a flea circus as one of their sideshow midgets."

Emmett was astonished with my ability to keep them coming, seeing as how I'd never played the game before. He snorted saying, "I cut you down so low, you'll need hiking gear to climb to the top of an ant hill."

"I cut you down so low, you'll be able to use a toothpick as a pole-vault stick," I countered, as I sat up leaning closer to him. I was starting to take this a little more seriously than needsbe; but he'd challenged me to this stupid game, and I was not about to let him win.

"Oh, yeah - I cut you down so low, you'll be able to hang glide on a Dorito." His references to food got the better of me. My laughing fit left me clutching my sides and gasping for air.

I tried my best to compose my**-**self, but my laughing was making it hard for me to speak. I choked out, "I cut you down so low, you'll have to use dental floss as toilet paper."

His laughter roared through out the house, rattling all the windows. "I cut you down so low, you'll be able to use a butter knife as a diving board." he hoarsely threw back, trying hold back his laughter so that he could speak.

"I think I going to pass out," I said as I took several deep breaths trying to breathe air in enough air to keep myself from doing just that. I just couldn't seem to stop laughing: "Emmett, I cut you down so low, you'll be able to play roller derby on a toilet seat."

Emmett fell to the floor, looking as if her were having convulsions.

We were so caught up playing this utterly ridiculous game, that time had flown by and without priorwarning we were surprised to hear the family entering the foyer.

"Without argument, Bella, you are the Cut Down Queen," he said taking my hand, shaking it furiously, as he congratulated me.

He was right, not one person has ever been able to top me. Not even the fortune teller, Alice.

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A/N: Now it's time to send me your thoughts in the form of a review. So, what did you think? Has anyone ever played, much less heard of this utterly silly game? **

**If you would like to see what exactly happened when Emmett smashed Charlie's TV, check out, "When Life Gives You Emmett," by Porcelain Face. I guarantee she'll have you LOL. :)**


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